I haven't blogged in 2 months!!!

Man, am I ever a slacker? I haven't logged onto my blog in like 2 months!! Needless to say it's been very, very busy. The good news is that in my 2 month absence, my car has been repaired. I really missed old "Black Attack" while she was in the shop; of course, I'm paranoid that it will happen again. If it does, you better believe I'm letting her burn to the ground though!! :D

In other news, the highway safety contract at my office is back so I can continue doing the job I love. If anyone needs anything highway safety related--I'm the gal to call. I've even had to learn about truck hitches AND how to back a trailer in the midst of this whole contract deal. But, again...I love it and I will not complain.

Also, being the total and complete nerd that I am, I've rediscovered my love for needlepoint. I highly recommend THE EYE OF THE NEEDLE in Lexington for all your needlepoint needs.

Now, onto other news...my dad has been really sick. He did so well with his first 3 chemotherapy treatments, but the 4th one proved to be very hard on him. He's been so weak--can't eat, can't drink, some days can barely maneuver around. It's really very difficult to watch the change happen. The doctors ordered a CT scan and the results were good; the doctor seems to think that the cancer is gone. As a precaution though, he wanted dad to take 2 more treatments but at a lower dose. He has one more--the week of Christmas--and then they will do another PET Scan to get more detailed results. I sure hope that he can start the road to recovery very soon. As hard as this has been on him, my mom has suffered too and that too is hard to watch. She is such a good caregiver; whatever he wants--she tries so hard to make sure he gets it.

Other than that, as Stewie Griffin would say, "the world keeps on spinning." Every day presents something new--sometimes good, sometimes bad...but always worth it.

There's An Old Flame Burning In My Car?!

Weird things happen to me. I get frostbite in August, my vision improves to almost perfect without surgical assistance and my car catches on fire.

As usual, I was running late this morning and decided that I would put on my foundation/blush at home, but fix my eyes when I got to the office. I roll into the LCADD parking lot around 8:20 and head to my office to begin returning phone calls and while on hold I discover a few stray eyebrows so I pluck them and then start putting on my eyeshadow when over the loudspeaker I hear, "CLARISSA HART COME TO THE FRONT OFFICE IMMEDIATELY!" I was about half irritated because, after all, I was on the phone (albeit on hold) and my makeup still wasn't finished. But, as duty calls, I must answer so I head up to the front office where I'm informed that my CAR IS ON FIRE!!! Uh, what?! My car? Is on fire? Are you KIDDING me? Sure enough, I look outside and there is smoke billowing from under the hood of old 'Black Attack.' I walk on outside, pop the hood and HOLY MOTHER OF PEARL--there are FLAMES shooting out from under the hood!! This is not a good sign. Something is obviously awry. Luckily, someone has enough sense to get the fire extinguisher and curb the fire. Once it's out, I realize that there will be people to call, people to see about this catastrophe and I am still only looking half put together. So I rush back inside, hurriedly throw on the rest of my eye makeup and begin calling the necessary people.

Moments later it looks like a memorial to my car. The hood is up and people are gathered around viewing the deceased. I wanted us to hold hands and sing, "Amazing Grace" but I didn't figure anyone would go for that. Soon the wrecker came and hauled my car away where the damage can properly be assessed. The next step in the whole process was giving a recorded statement to my insurance adjuster. It lasted 25 minutes and I answered a string of bizarre questions such as, 'what color were the flames that shot out?' and 'have you been in any altercations recently--or have any enemies?' or 'how long have you had that set of tires on your car?' and one of my favorite, 'how do you plan on getting home today?'

I am anxious to see how this all plays out for me and my 'hunka hunka burning love' car!

PICTURES HERE!!

Memoirs of a Bridesmaid

I left Russell Springs on Thursday morning for the mountains of Letcher County in Eastern Kentucky for my college roommate--and one of my best friends--wedding. After 3 plus hours on the road--and winding up and down mountain roads (DUSTY mountain roads I might add) I finally arrived at the Jenkins Country Club to find the bride-to-be and her family elbow deep in reception decorations, so I rolled up my sleeves and soon found myself in the middle of feather boas, crystal trees and loads of candy. The bride--who I will refer to as either Jessica or Joder depending on my mood--rescued me from the decorations and took me to the church so we could just WATCH the professionals decorate the church. Now, from the outside, this looked like just a normal old church; the sign said it was built in 1913. But, when we walked in the sanctuary, it was AMAZING! The stained glass windows were huge and absolutely gorgeous. Jessica told me that these windows came over from Italy and that they've tried to have them insured but can't because they are virtually priceless. On the outside, the windows have these ugly thick grey window coverings so that the stained glass won't be broken. Family ties aside, I understood completely why she wanted to get married here. I snapped out of my awe stricken state to get back to work for there were things to do--pulpits to move and arguments to be had over candelabras. Don't people know the bride is always right?! Finally, we call it a night and make the 30 minute trip to Pikeville where we are staying with Jessica's mom.

Day 2: Friday, October 3rd. I wake at 7:45 am and decide that although I look like a skank, I don't care because I'm just heading back to Jenkins for more DECORATING! First though, I had to go to the bridal store and pick up a bridesmaid's dress and Jessica's wedding dress. Then, I drive the 30 minutes to Jenkins. I arrive in Jenkins and am immediately assigned the task of driving into Whitesburg (also a town in Letcher County) to take Jessica's sister Emily to get her eyebrows waxed. Emily is very quiet, and as a big talker, quiet people make me nervous so we basically rode in silence to "The Copper Comb" which we later find out wasn't the hair shop where we were supposed to go. But anyway, the eyebrows got waxed and to make sure there was legitimate silence on the way back, I offered to let 16 year old Emily drive my car back to the country club. I was quiet...she was quiet...and we arrived in one piece; I call that MAJOR SUCCESS.

Now, back at the country club there were chargers to be put on each table, water goblets to be placed 'just so' and a million other little details to see to...all while the groom relaxes on the golf course as his BIG MAJOR task of 'getting the keg' has been completed. Just goes to show that a woman's work is never done. We realize that the rehearsal is drawing nigh so Jessica and I set out for Neon (yet another town in Letcher County)to the infamous "GRANNY AND PAPAW HOGG'S HOUSE" to shower and get ready for the rehearsal. I mention to Granny that I needed to iron my dress slacks to which she replies, 'just take them off and hand them to me and I'll go throw them in the dryer.' So, I did just what she told me and took refuge in her bedroom until she came back with my nice, warm, wrinkle-free slacks. That's the kind of people they are...they make you feel like family.

The rehearsal and the dinner following was pretty uneventful--not much to tell. I got to catch up with another one of my college roommates--Jessica Childers Morelock and with Jessica Dennis Mullins who is one of my best friends from college as well. We went back to the country to finish up and again hit the sack sometime after midnight.

THE BIG DAY--SATURDAY, OCTOBER 4TH!
I got to sleep until about 8:30/9:00, shower, dry my hair and drive on with all my wedding day supplies to the church. When I get there--YOU GUESSED IT--MORE DECORATING!!!!!! Thankfully though, it was very minimal. Most of the morning was spent being entertained by the flower girl--Lauren Mullins. She is one funny little girl. Lauren's mommy (Jessica Dennis Mullins) sang in the wedding and had us all crying while she was practicing...I love her voice. I tried to upload a video of her singing but it was taking FOREVER! Sorry...just trust me when I say that she is very talented.

We finally dried our eyes and headed back to our holding quarters to finish getting ready. I got my make-up on and then had to get the dress on, but more important than the dress was the SPANX. Jessica Mullins had to help me tuck the Spanx under my bra because I didn't want there to be any slippage going on. Finally I'm in the dress and then it hits me...Jessica Hogg is getting MARRIED! Wow! For as long as I've known Jessica, she's described her fantasy wedding to me--right down to the bouquet and the way she wanted to take her guests and grooms breath when they saw her for the first time in her dress. These are not the things I wanted to think about as I got ready to march down the isle in my burnt orange bridesmaids dress. But, when the time came and I went down that isle, all I could think about was how this truly was her day--the day she has always dreamed of. Then they opened those doors and there she stood with her dad and I couldn't help it--I CRIED LIKE A BABY! It's a good thing i wrapped Kleenex around my flowers. I cried the entire ceremony...partly because my feet were killing me. Thank goodness I was up against a wall so that when the preacher prayed his 23 minute prayer (well it SEEMED that long to me) I could lean up against the wall for a some relief. I'm pretty sure that will look great in the wedding video (sorry!).

As soon as the wedding was over, I kicked off those darned old heels and put on my flip flops; thank the Lord for small blessings. I drove to the reception only to find that I drove there with the sash to my dress hanging out the door of my car. Oh it doesn't stop there...I went to the bathroom and the ties to my corseted back dress went down in the toilet. They were only a little bit wet. I dried them as best I could and got ready to BOOGIE DOWN!! The dancing was great but the videographers had those cameras in our faces all night so I should apologize to the bride and groom now for all the horrible dance moves I came up with that night. I will also apologize for the 'white girl face' I do while dancing. All too soon, we lit our sparklers and sent the newlyweds on their way. However, with as much decorating that had been going on--NO ONE EVEN OFFERED TO DECORATE THE GET-AWAY CAR!! I think the groomsmen let us down on that one. MEN!! Such slackers.

And with that, I do believe my bridesmaids days are over. I have escaped with only having 5-6 dresses in my closet that will never be worn again. Someone should really make a movie about girls that are always the bridesmaid and never the bride and call it something catchy like "5 Dresses"...no, no...5 isn't enough. How about a random number like..."27 Dresses." Seriously, someone should make that movie!

All in all the weekend was a blast. It was good to meet new friends and reacquaint myself with old ones. It was good to see Jessica's dream wedding become a reality and to know that my hot dance moves will forever be immortalized!! CONGRATS MR. AND MRS. SCOTT CARTY!!

check out the wedding pics here!!

This is a test...only a test...

Just wanted to see if my new Picasa Web Album was working. If so, enjoy the pictures from my bluegrass festival in August.

Bald IS beautiful

Today was the day that my dad's hair lost its battle with cancer, BUT the good news is--the rest of him is still fighting!! The experience was better for me than I initially thought it would be and as always, his outlook is superb. I still think he's pretty cute.

Older and Wiser

It's official...my 20's are nearly over. I have 363 days left in the decade that brought a ton of change. From college to my first real job to the births of my nieces and nephews, THIS was the decade that let me have a front row seat to my friend's weddings and the births of their children and allowed me to realize that I'm officially a grown up now. How on earth did this happen? It really is true that we wish our lives away, never being content with the current phase of our lives. When you're in high school, you want to be in college. When you're in college, you want to get out of school and get a job. When you get that job you've longed for and the 9-5 becomes monotonous, you wish your college days were back. When you're single, you want to get married. Once you're married, often you miss the freedom that is associated with being single. Then comes the kids--and when they're small you want them to hurry up and be able to be a bit more independent. Then they grow up and you want them to be small again. At what point are we satisfied? It usually happens when we're too old to enjoy it (I'm not quite there yet). So, with my 363 days remaining in my 20's, I'm going to try my darndest to cherish every single moment I have with the people who make my life so full. I'm going to try to look back on this decade with utter and complete joy and realize that the best is yet to come.

Some Days You've Got To Dance

When I was a kid, my dad and some of his cousins and co-workers would get together to play music on the weekends. Naturally, my brother, sister and I were in attendance so we practically were weaned on bluegrass and country music. We learned early on that you can't have a bluegrass jam without--you guessed it--good clogging!! I vividly remember someone throwing sawdust down on the dance floor and everyone getting up and dancing. Man, those were the days!! Somewhere around 3rd or 4th grade I started taking clogging lessons and loved every minute of it. Although it's hard to see, here is a video of some cloggers at the festival this past weekend.


In other news, my dad goes in Thursday for a biopsy of his lung. He will be in the hospital for a few days and then will face a 2-4 week recovery period. Remember him in your prayers, please.

Fun Filled Weekend

The bluegrass festival is over and as always, I had a great time!! We had good music, beautiful weather, lots of clogging (I'm sore), and funnel cakes (need I say more?). Work begins next week to start planning the 2009 festival. There really is no rest for the weary. The only thing that bothered me about this years festival is that none of my friends came. Now, I know it's true that none of my friends are bluegrass lovers, BUT STILL it would have been nice to have had their support especially since this is something that I love so much. They have their spouses/children that they love and hold dear and I have the festival...so why can't they show up?? Don't I attend all those important things that matter to them--weddings, showers, births? It hurts my feelings a little; just looked at what they missed!

Bluegrass Is Coming!!

Well as most of you know, my labor of love for the past 5 years has been the "Lake Cumberland Bluegrass Festival." Our 5th festival is next weekend and let me tell you-I'm feeling the crunch!! It makes me wonder why on earth I do this to myself year after year; pushing the festival...advertising...soliciting donations...booking bands from all over the place...dealing with needy food vendors...feeling rejected when a business doesn't see my idea as GREAT and therefore they decline to sponsor...THEN it hits me:

I do this for a number of reasons. It's the feeling you get when people start actually showing up for something you've worked so hard on...when they thank you because they've had such a good time...when you look out into the crowd and you see someone singing along...when I decide I don't care how much my boobs and fat rolls might flop around--dang it--I'm getting up and clogging every time a fiddler takes off on "Sally Goodin"...when a grown adult hoops and hollers over a hot break on the banjo...when I see GREAT people that I would have never met otherwise...it's then I realize that nothing worth having is easy. Yes, it's hard work all year long for a 2day event, but I wouldn't trade those happy feelings (and happy memories) for anything in the world (not even to be the mother of Matthew McConaughey's next child).

Having said that--everyone is invited. I promise you'd have a good time!! August 15/16 @ KOA Campground in Russell Springs...be there or be talked about. :D

And Now We Know...

I decided last week that I wouldn't blog again until I knew the results of my dad's PET Scan from Thursday. My mom called me this morning and said that the doctor asked that he meet with her to discuss the results. After I picked my heart up off the floor, I sat on pins and needles all morning just waiting (that't realllllllllly hard if you're not a patient person).

Mom called back around noon to say, (ENVELOPE PLEASE):

The spots on the liver showed NOTHING during the PET Scan! (Thank God)
The spot on the left lung showed NOTHING during the PET Scan! (Praise the Lord)
There are 2 tiny spots on the right lung that will need to be biopsied but they're so small that they can't biopsy them with a needle. A lung specialist is going to look at his scans and see if they can do another scan or if they need to do a surgical biopsy. There is a chance that he will have to undergo some chemotherapy for these 'suspicious spots' and we are ready to do whatever is necessary to get rid of them for good. All of his other organs came back clean...I feel so incredibly blessed. I know there is power in prayer and we've had a lot of people praying. I just can't express how relieved I am...

Still Waiting...

It has sure been a long and trying week, but my dad goes tomorrow for his PET Scan. We've been blessed with wonderful friends and family that have been praying for us and words are so inadequate to describe our gratitude. I've learned that I need to improve my prayer life so that when someone has a need and feels the urgency that I am feeling right now--I can get down to business and be an effective prayer warrior for them. Every day has been a struggle and I've just had to say, 'God you are in control and I trust you.' Pretty simple prayer, but it's all I know to do. This has been such an humbling experience and I hate that I've waited until something looks bad to depend so heavily on my faith. Everything is going to be fine.

Oh, and another thing...my toe is getting better. I had to go back to the doctor yesterday and I am now allowed back in the pool (thank heavens). It has really sucked having 'TOLIO.'

Faith Looks Up

As most of you know, 3 years ago my dad was diagnosed with cancer. It was found early and a golf ball size mass was removed from the right side of his neck. He went though 7 week of radiation, was threatened with the possibility of a feeding tube, yet by the grace of God got a clean bill of health after his treatments were over. We were so surprised when he intially found out--we found out on like a Tuesday and by the next Tuesday they were scheduling surgery. Ever since then, my biggest fear is that the cancer would return. As a true 'Daddy's Girl' the thought of it returning has kept me up many nights. He had a routine check-up yesterday and a chest x-ray revealed a mass on one of his lungs. Our family doctor sent him for more extensive scans which revealed 2 spots on his right lung, 1 on his left lung and a possible spot on his liver...NOT the news we were hoping for. The doctors think it could be cancer. He goes Thursday for an PET Scan to see if the spots are active or not. I know I have to be strong for my dad and act as though nothing is out of the ordinary. I firmly believe that outlook and attitude are 90% of the battle. Please pray for my dad--and my entire family as we anxiously await the results of this scan. As Christians, we wholeheartedly believe that God is in control and we rest assured that His will be done. Thank you for your prayers; we will need them.

From Head To Toe

Well folks, this blog starts with a story and a warning--THE PICTURE IS OF GRAPHIC NATURE AND IS NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART. About 3 weeks ago, my sister and I purchased new steps for my mom and dad's swimming pool. The steps are called 'Wedding Cake Tier Steps' ( I really hope you can visualize that). So, 3 weeks ago, we were having some trouble getting the water to clear up and you couldn't see the bottom step; being the total and complete klutz that I am, I stubbed my toe on the bottom step, it tore my skin loose from the nail, bled, and all that other disgusting stuff (ewwwww). It did everything but heal. So after 3 weeks of pursuasion from my mom and sister, I decided to go visit my family doctor whom we all love and adore--Dr. Miles. Apparently my neglect led to an infection which had to be cauterized and let me tell you--it hurt like a mofo. As soon as the procedure was over, I broke out in a sweat, felt like my arms weighed a ton, thought I might throw up...Dr. Miles says, "Moochie--you're not going to pass out on me are you?!" He jumps up, lays me down, starts fanning me, starts rubbing my face with cold, wet rags (much to my embarrassment). I never knew I was such a wimp!!! I told him--'NO CHILDBIRTH FOR ME!' I imagine that it hurts much worse that a cauterized toe. Now I know you all are simply DYING to see what this looks like and I'm here to oblige. My hat's off the those in healthcare. I obviously couldn't handle it.

So that about covers the toe part (I'm so sorry, I just had to share...maybe it will convince us all to immediately go to the doctor and not wait 3 weeks). Now, on the head part of the blog. Yesterday afternoon my mother comes jingle-jangling down the hallway (turns out the jingle-jangle is from a charm bracelet that she's had since God was a boy). She makes some comment about how she'd love to have some charms of her grandbabies, to which I reply in my best southern english, "You ain't even got a picture of me on that old thang!" She insists that a picture of my sister as a baby is actually me (but I know better--I was waaaaaaay cuter). My sister and I then decide that we are going to prove that the picture is not me, but is her (I never wore double knit dresses--that was soooo 1973). While plundering through my mom's things my sister comes across this old wig that my mom has had since the 60's. She tries it on--as does her 2 year old and we just couldn't stop laughing!! Sooooo...that about covers everything--from head to toe.

Swimming, Slim Fast, Singledom--all in one blog!

This past Saturday, I was thrilled to spend the day with my 2 nieces--Maggie and Natalie, and my 2 nephews--Cass and Eli. We sure do love our time in the pool. As you can tell, these little beauties are in training for the 2020 Summer Olympics. Move over Michael Phelps...there are some new kids on the (starting) block.

In other recent events--I have started the Slim Fast diet (more like Slim SLOW) in order to better fit into a bridesmaid dress for my college roommate Jessica's wedding on October 4th. Jessica is the last of my 'single' friends to tie the knot and I must admit that it's a little sad for me because now I'm the lone single person in my group of friends. It's a couples world out there folks and if you're single in a couples world, pretty soon you will find that get togethers revolve around which diapers are preferred--or whose mother-in-law is the most annoying. I guess that we're all in different places and I'm learning that it's more than alright...being single isn't so bad afterall; no dirty diapers and no nagging mother-in-law. Maybe I can just be the cool aunt until it's time for something more.

I'm a blogger now!!!

Who reads these things anyway??? This is my first official post as a blogger and I must admit that I'm lost and learning as I go. I hope that this is both interesting and fun--that's what I'm aiming for anyway. Thanks!!

Moochie